I asked Annarose what is it about cutting that makes it addictive and this is what she wrote:
I think it was the change overall, not exactly college life, that dragged me into depression. I wasn’t sure how to handle someone who had tried to take their own life. It sounds selfish now, and very ignorant, but that is why I distanced myself from my home friends. I felt responsible for her depression, and instead of trying to help her through it and be there for her, I fled and pushed away people that I had been friends with for my entire life. It’s safe to say I didn’t handle change all that well, and I certainly wasn’t prepared to cut ties with all the people that I loved, but I did and instead of dealing with all of it, I made myself suffer as a result.
Cutting is addictive because of the rush of endorphins that are released once you cause yourself pain. I’ve heard that it is comparable to a high you can get from a drug, though I’m no expert in that department. It also becomes routine. It’s what I would do if I was sad or stressed or tired or mad or hurt to make myself feel better, but it was also what I’d do on a Tuesday morning in the shower just because I was so used to it. It’s something you get used to and rely on. It’s not “cool” though, nor is it something I’d recommend. I think it has become a trend, especially among teens, and I think it is something that needs to be stopped. Forums like this will help, so thank you for that.
Lots of love and thanks to all who have read this… hope that everyone can find it in them to share their story. It helps, I promise. Xo, Annarose
Thank you Annarore